Old fashioned values

Parenting in this technological, entitled, over stimulated, over scheduled environment is more challenging than ever. Yes, my generation of parents are trying not to be as repressive and controlling as our parents (and adults in general) were when we were  young and that can be a good thing, but I believe that we have taken it too far in the oppostite direction. Being cool and being your kid's friend is not healthy and it is not working. I have read articles, many written by mental health professionals, making excuses for this type of parenting and giving permission for it. I do not agree. It is nice to have a closer relationship with our kids than we had with our parents however, our kids still need to know who is boss and they need to know that we are not thier freinds. Too often have I observed kids from 2nd grade to 12th grade talking to their parents in a way that makes me cringe. And when I observe this the questions in my thought bubble are: "why are you letting your kid treat you like this?" "What do you think you are teaching your kid by allowing this?" "Do you have any idea how your are going to suffer later?"

Successful parenting is all about balance so let's start implementing some old fashioned values like: show respect for your elders, think about someone besides your self, don't speak if you don't have anything nice to say, Stop whining!, eat what's in front of you, be kind just for the sake of being kind ect. There are many more I'm sure but this is a start. We can be close with our kids and make them feel safe enough to communicate honestly with us at the same time demanding respect and setting limits on behaviors  that are clearly unacceptable in most civilized societies.

Comment and questions are welcomed!

Comments

[Hunger]

The fact is, good parenting is easier in the long run than bad parenting. Good parenting is like good car repair. When car repair is done by someone with good tools who understands the job, the car will run well. When a car is repaired by someone who knows little or is careless, the car is likely to be a big problem.

[The Parent Whisperer]

You got that right. Maybe you can pass my blog on to others. I have stopped writing because I have not figured out how to get my blog "out there." I am currently writing for L.A. parent magazine. Check it out.
Thanks for the comment.
Tony